remember the girl abused with forks, knives, and razorblades [entries|friends|calendar] miss shelly centerfold [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

Sorry! [25 Oct 2011|03:37pm] For some unknown reason LJ isn't letting me reply to comments and I'm too damn tired to figure it out. So to the ladies who congratulated me on my new job, thank you very much. I can't believe how lucky I am in my life these days. Except for being sick right now because some people are assholes who can't keep their illnesses to themselves. Posted via m.livejournal.com. remember the girl

Holy Fuck! [23 Sep 2011|08:12pm] Wanna hear a funny story? I got a job in the ICU! Critical care is one of the highest regarded areas of nursing. And it's damn near impossible to get in. Especially when you have under a year of general nursing experience. So it's the equivalent of winning the lottery with my career. So I'm currently in this 6 week crash course in the ICU. I just finished my midterm today (92%, bitches!) And I'm finally feeling like I might be okay doing this. That maybe this is the right choice for me. Posted via m.livejournal.com. 2 razorblades|remember the girl

[01 Jan 2011|05:16am] So, just a quick update. -I love my job. -Brad and I are renting a condo from his aunt and are moving our stuff in this week. -We bought a new bed, to be delivered on the 7th. -I feel like a real grown-up now. remember the girl

Success! [16 Dec 2010|02:55am] Good news, kittens! My years of toiling away, trying to make something out of myself have finally paid off. I'm now a Registered Nurse recognized by the College and Association of Registered Nurses of Alberta. What does that all mean? It means you can now all address me as Michelle the Hussy, RN. I get my full RN pay, including back pay from the difference between graduate nurse and registered nurse ($2.75/hour). It also means I'm fucking awesome. I love life. Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.

Holy. Fuck. Balls. [13 Oct 2010|02:08am] Today, I'll be starting my new job. All of my patience and waiting paid off and I got a casual position as a graduate nurse (the level before you get certified as a registered nurse via the Canadian Registered Nurse Exam that I wrote last week). It was looking bleak for awhile and I was considering a private nursing job, but then I had that lovely phone call for a job interview. Excited Hussy is excited. And terrified. It's 50/50. On the one hand, I can't wait to be a real nurse. On the other hand, I've always had an instructor or preceptor to work with and now I'll be by myself. It's like working without a net. Yes, there's other nurses that I can work with so I'm never really alone. However, it's still scary. So that's pretty much my life. 2 razorblades|remember the girl

[01 Oct 2010|03:07am] And a side note: now that someone's taken the horse out back and euthanized it (I know you're laughing, Jill), feel free to have your world rocked with my snarkasm at Michelle the Hussy Is A Bitch In 140 Characters Or Less. It's how I roll, bitches. I didn't want to post it before, but it's all good now. Also, had a job interview for my dream job on Monday. Here's hoping it all works out because this hussy wants to be someone in life. Aside from an awesome dame, obviously. 1 razorblade|remember the girl

[01 Oct 2010|02:16am] Mission accomplished. remember the girl

[10 Sep 2010|02:10am] Friday: MILFs Gone Wild! (I'm not a legit MILF with the whole lack of uterine parasite thingies, but I am an honourary one thanks to all my mother-type friends [Kylie, Kristin, Diane, Laurie, Sherry, Kelly, etc]). So prepare for some serious debauchery, Calgary. Or at least Kristin motorboating me again. Saturday: Kelly's housewarming party! Again, this will probably be quite full of win. See? I do stuff. Suck it, bitches. 1 razorblade|remember the girl

[09 Sep 2010|03:12pm] Can I say (in a totally unsarcastic way) that I love Amanda, Marisha, and Rebecca? They're probably the most awesome people ever and any rage I have is not directed at them. Ever. Nor have I ever been mad at Jill. She's amazing and rocks my world with her fantastic ass. We're close like two tits in a push-up bra. So no, those folks were not the focus of the rant. Try again. It's also two people in there who need to get killed. 2 razorblades|remember the girl

[09 Sep 2010|01:51am] So we're clear, not talking to me for a year and then calling me asking for a favor? Go fuck yourself. I'm not your fucking monkey. Also, if the drama-whore who continues to fill up my Facebook page with her own insipid self-involved bullshit could please choke on a dick, that'd be great. Please save your self-involved insipid comments for another venue. HOW CAN I MISS YOU IF YOU WONT FALL UNDER A TRAIN AND DIE?! 3 razorblades|remember the girl

[02 Sep 2010|03:44am] Y'know, if everyone calls you an alcoholic bitch who does nothing but whine about all her "friends" (when in reality she has almost no true friends but instead a group of people who tolerate her presence because they need someone to make fun of) and hides behind excuses instead of actually doing shit with herself, it's time to re-evaluate your life. That was a very long run-on sentence. Oh, and everyone still hates you. 1 razorblade|remember the girl

[23 Jul 2010|03:00am] So this is where I give the obligatory update about my life. 1. I finished my preceptorship. It was incredible. 2. I subsequently completed my Bachelor of Nursing. I have never done anything so important before in my whole life. 3. My temporary license arrived in the mail that allows me to practice as a graduate nurse until I pass my RN exam. So I'm legally allowed to practice. In fact, they encourage this. 1 razorblade|remember the girl

Just Don't Feel The Same [07 Jun 2010|09:33pm] It's like spring cleaning my life, except with more people getting kicked out instead of dust bunnies. So sick of toxic and overly dramatic people. They're unable to be happy for me for any reason, and think everyone in their life exists only for their amusement. So I'm starting to cut ties with them. Since I'm not an absolute cunt, I'm choosing to just fade out of their lives and not cause a huge scene. It's not worth it. Not now. There was a time when I'd fight it out, but it's not worth it. I know who my actual friends are, and that's what matters. In other news, I'm kicking ass in my final focus. It stresses me out, and sometimes I want to shank someone, but I love it. This is what I'm supposed to be doing. I help people every day I'm there. I have a purpose that I still marvel at. It's wonderful. 1 razorblade|remember the girl

[02 Jun 2010|09:40pm] I finally nailed an IV insertion on Monday! 5 razorblades|remember the girl

[30 May 2010|04:26am] If I ever reach the point where getting drunk at house parties is inappropriate, or when showing my boobs to win Flip Cup is not okay, or dancing to TMD is unacceptable, I want you to kill me. I'm serious. That's not a life I want. 1 razorblade|remember the girl

Are You In? [03 May 2010|11:26pm] For those of you who care, I got my final placement today. And, since I'm fucking awesome, I got my dream placement: Geriatric Assessment and Rehabilitation Program. I've been hoping to get it for over a year, and I did. I'm a pretty badass hussy (don't worry, I'm taking it back). I start at 7am, so I'm going to bed. Anyways, I'm really excited. Nervous, scared, excited, and eager. All rolled into one. I'll update tomorrow. remember the girl

Hearing Damage, v2.5 [02 May 2010|06:12pm] [ mood | cheerful ] From what I can figure out from last night... I started drinking at Charlotte's friend's house with Becka, James, Cailin, Shauna, Matt, Shawn, some guy named Chris, and a few other people We ended up playing Sociables, which led to me being nice and liquored up by the time we hit the Back Alley We took a cab to said venue I saw Sarah, Nick, Nathan, and some other people I just kept drinking I was hit on by some really hot guys, but luckily I have some really great friends who intervene before bad situations arise Things get kinda blurry after that But I do remember peeing in Becka's yard because we got locked out of the house I started getting severe pain so I Brad came and picked me up and I went home. I'm surprised I figured that much out. But the good news is that since there were no new boob pictures on my phone, I kept it classy. See? I'm a grown up and stuff. I'm seriously surprised I didn't end up puking last night. I was stupid-drunk. Beyond stupid drunk. It was retarded. But it was my goddamned birthday, and I love dancing. So it was crucial to get my ass on the dancefloor. Tomorrow I start my final focus in nursing. Which just means I find out what's going on for the next few months so I can prepare. HOLY FUCK, WHERE'S YOUR GOD NOW? Certainly not helping me throw loonies at strippers. remember the girl

A Gaping Hole In My Chest [29 Apr 2010|10:57pm] [ mood | crushed ] I'm writing this entry on my mom's laptop tonight. I can't stand to be in the room where I keep my laptop, which is right next to Bubba's cage. It hurts too much. Yesterday, Brad and I went downstairs to feed Bubba and divide up his food (we put it inside different bags to keep it fresh). Brad immediately noticed that Bubba was moving around weird, and it seemed there was something wrong with his right hindleg. The way he moved was very similar to when Annie (my childhood cat) had a stroke in 2003, so my heart was in my throat. We could see his spine was curved, so it was more than just a little bit of a tender foot. Brad took him out of his cage and we put him on the floor in the living room. He didn't run like he normally would, but instead kind of pivotted around. I started to cry at this point. He began to lose control of his bowels (when I picked him up, there were tons of pellets on the floor under him, and he normally holds it until he's in his cage because we litter trained him years ago). Brad called his mom and then found a vet while I stayed with Bubba. I tried giving him hay, but he ignored it. Brad came back, said he found a vet, so we gathered Bubba into his carrier and drove to the vet's office. When we got to the vet, we were immediately taken into a room. The doctor came in after what seemed like an eternity (it was only about 5 minutes), and examined Bubba. She determined he had a broken leg, and the actual fracture was very high up in his femur. In order to repair it, they'd have to do a major surgery. Brad and I knew that it would be wrong to put him through that kind of painful procedure, so we chose instead to have him put to sleep. This was a situation Brad and I had discussed before, but it was still the most difficult thing I have ever had to do. I asked if I could stay with Bubba until he was gone, but the doctor said that wouldn't be possible. Instead, she gave him a tranquilizer so he fell asleep in Brad and I's arms. As he started to fall asleep, he relaxed so much I was able to hold him in my arms, cradled to my chest like a baby. I just kept thinking that no one could ever say that I don't understand love, because I was losing my child. I just kept stroking his soft fur and sobbing and whispering his name. When I passed him to Brad so he could hold him, Bubba yawned his bunny yawn that I'd seen him do so many times and Brad and I laughed through the tears. Finally, the vet came and took him away. I feel like my heart has been ripped out and there's just this gaping hole left in my chest. I keep crying everytime I don't hear him jumping around in his cage, or the rattling of his toys and water bottle. My friend called last night and we spoke for about an hour, and I was pacing around the house and I went to go check on Bubba out of habit, and then I realized he wasn't there. It's little things like that which are making this real. Every time I realize he's not here anymore, it literally feels like I can't breathe. I'm walking around in this fog of apathy until it hits me, and then I just can't breathe again. The fight's gone out of me. I got Bubba over 5 years ago. I went to the pet store with some friends shortly after I moved out of my parents house. When I saw Bubba look at me with those big eyes and the inquisitive look on his face, I knew it was meant to be. I called Brad, and he was reluctant to have a rabbit until he looked at Bubba. The store had no information on him except that he'd been surrendered back to the store, and they thought he was male. That's literally it. No idea on an age except that he was an adult, most likely between the ages of 2 and 6. We took him home that day and never looked back. He was such a happy bunny who loved to eat hay and lettuce. He learned how to jump up stairs just last month, and Brad and I were ecstatic. He'd chase the cats around the house when we let him run around. He was smart as hell, and always defiant. But he was never defiant in a way that made you angry, but just in a way that would make you laugh. We don't know how he broke his leg, but the general theory is that his bones were brittle from aging and he jumped off of his igloo (he had a pink plastic igloo to sleep in, but he used to sit on top of it and watch the world) and landed badly. Brad and I made sure he always had a safe cage and we always handled him with care. But my baby was getting old and, like humans, sometimes small falls/impact can cause huge damage. I've had people asking me what they can do, and Brad and I would appreciate donations done to The Calgary Humane Society in memory of Bubba Tomlinson-White. Any amount is appreciated in order to help other animals, especially rabbits. You can also donate to Petland Pets For Life, since we got Bubba from a Petland store. Bubba's life made such an impact on mine that I can't imagine the past five years without him, and it will be painful to go on without him. I will never forget my baby Bubba. I love you, Bubba. Always. 2 razorblades|remember the girl

SEX PERVERT! [27 Apr 2010|04:14am] At 4:20pm Mountain Time, I'll be 25 years old. And I'm determined to make this my best year yet. You haven't seen any of my best, world. But you will. 1 razorblade|remember the girl

Holy fuck. [08 Apr 2010|11:30pm] This is going to be an entry about poop. And since Jill has taught me to have NO SHAME about this stuff (everybody poops, dammit), I'm just gonna talk about it. I've been having some issues with the chronic diarrhea. To be honest, I've been having major issues since they took my gallbladder out. I've made adjustments to what I eat, trying to cut back on fatty foods and such, but no earthshattering changes. Brad and I were able to pinpoint MSG as being a trigger, so I've made every effort to avoid it. But tonight I'm in hell. I've been in the bathroom almost all night and I'm in tears because it hurts. I know it's just some stupid sensitivity to something, but I just can't figure it out. It's not accompanied with any other symptoms (no weight loss, anorexia, blood), so I'm not all that concerned. It's just the pain. And seeing as every doctor tells me it's all in my head (y'know, like they did when I had kidney stones and gallstones for over 2 years but said it was all in my head), I'm frustrated as fuck. I'm not looking for advice or sympathy. I'm just venting. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. 8 razorblades|remember the girl

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